I consider myself a fairly savvy, hip parent. I try to keep up with current teenage slang. My son proved to me recently that I’m slowing down in my middle-age.
I was out of town last week and in an effort to keep up with my teenager, I checked in on his Facebook page frequently. He mysteriously posted, “I’m on that all green diet.” (I was pretty happy that he used a period and an apostrophe.)
My first thought was a happy one. He’s been working out for basketball every day after school, so maybe he’s finally decided to eat better, too! He wants more vegetables!
But I know this kid and I had suspicions. I asked him a few days later about his new “diet.” He looked at me like I was the crazy one. He replied, “What are you talking about?”
I said, “The diet you posted about on Facebook?”
He started laughing. “Mom, the ‘all green diet’ is money. I’m just all about the cash. Why would I post something about vegetables on my status?”
A couple of observations: 1) I’m older than I think I am. Plenty of my friends post things about vegetables on Facebook, so I made the obvious mistake of thinking a teenager would, too; 2) he doesn’t HAVE any money, so I guess it really is a green diet for him, but I don’t think that’s what he meant.